If humans would have the inherent characteristic to be alone and happy, perhaps the population would be a lot less and each one us would be occupying our own personal island. However, fortunately and unfortunately, we are highly evolved individuals, for whom to love and to be loved is a very basic necessity. Hence being in a relationship is an option which we do choose, to ensure our “Happily ever after life.”

However, sometimes relationships can be frustrating than expected all we pray for is to finally meet that special one who values us and makes our world a heaven on earth.

Well,if you have never had a broken relationship, there must be something involved, it’s either you are into one with Jesus hahah or you are all alone into it. But then, I am happy for you if yours is full of roses. Anyways as long as we humans are not perfect, our relationships will never be perfect but can be better through our personal efforts and commitments.

The truth must be told Sometimes we are confused as to deciding on what we truly want out of a relationship.

Common Causes of Failure

Lust for beauty and wealth

Believe it or not, money and beauty are not the major keys to a sustainable relationship. Maybe you can answer this by yourself. When the money which hitherto attracted you is lost, what happens to your relationship? If by virtue of old age her beauty fades, what happens to your relationship?
A man who is easily carried away by only the physical beauty of a woman and decides to go into a relationship with her will definitely opt out for another relationship when he sees another beautiful lady. This is the fact! He is simply being lustful!! He desires to get his iron serviced and thereafter is whisked away by another. However, this isn’t only the case for men. Nigerian society have painted men as being the only set of species with this attitudinal problem. Most ladies crave handsome guys too! Oh yeah!! You will hear some say “I wish I could feel his touch, he is so cute” haha come on guys, don’t get me wrongly, all I’m saying is this, a good relationship is founded on a more spectacular qualities of both parties for a lasting and sweet relationship and not lust.

Undefined Relationship

In Nigerian setting for example, no lady expects to be in a relationship that leads nowhere, most especially those who are “ripe” for marriage and are already seeing themselves in white gown. How would you keep a 29 year old lady for four years without any plans whatsoever for marriage to her but expect her to wait patiently for you? In a relationship where she is becoming pressured already by her family and friends to find herself a man? Definitely such a relationship will lead to failure.

Infidelity

This is a 99% contributory factor to breakups in relationships. Trust me, no partner will be happy to find the other messing around outside their relationship. Once this is the case, there is always a breach of trust. You know, once there is an element of doubt by a partner, such relationship becomes shaky.

Family Interference

In a complex nation like Nigeria with many tribes and tribal languages, families prefer an intra-ethnic marriage to inter-ethnic marriage for a more adequate relationship as far as language and behavioral culture is concerned. Therefore, parties in a relationship might be forced to breakup due to family pressure.

Sexual / Physical/Emotional Abuse

There is no gainsaying that guys are also abused not only physically but emotionally in a relationship. However, physical abuse on guys by ladies is less compared to emotional abuse. Most ladies who nag a lot can abuse their men emotionally. Ladies also suffer physical abuse too, this also leads to emotional abuse. Believe it or not, no one prays to be in a relationship where the body is turned into a drum, no lady wants to be assaulted sexually/raped but love making.

Other Causes

Lies, long distance between partners, inadequate communication, physical abuse.

Having stated the few factors to incessant failure of relationships, it’s worthwhile stating too that for there to be enjoyable and better relationships, there must be maturity of the mind. Both should endeavour to respect each other’s feelings. There is no perfect relationship anywhere but there is a better relationship somewhere and yours can be one of those. Make up your mind to make it work. A partner cannot make it work but two. Look beyond beauty and handsomeness of the body and look deep down the beauty of the mind. Relationship is sweet if only you put a sweet mind to it. Nothing is ever impossible if only we are ready.